Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
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