i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
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