OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
Randomize
