Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
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