So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
Green mimosas i think yes
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
He was actually surprised when I poured myself a glass full of straight vodka. Clearly he doesn't know me as well as he thinks.
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
Randomize
