it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
Woke up to a note written on my hand that read "just because he kisses you, doesn't mean you have to sleep with him"
next time, write it on your vagina so its more effective.
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
Randomize
