Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
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