Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
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