My mom just informed me that my dog licks their toes while her and my dad are having sex. I'm apartment searching.
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
So much Jack, so little girl.
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
Randomize
