Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
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