So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
I was 40 minutes late to work today because I was getting fucked. Walked in to discover that it's apparently performance review day. Employee of the year.
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
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