its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
What do I have to do to get you laid? I talked to that girl with the ugly dog for 45 minutes trying to get you in, and all you said was "Steven Spielberg is my favorite director."
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
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