i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
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