There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
Randomize
