thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize
