Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
I'm timing the release of my poops to the sound of the machine gun from the video game he's playing in the living room.
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
Randomize
