Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
I'm Michael Phelps, Olympic Champion.
Are you just smoking weed? Cause that's not actually a Michael Phelps costume
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize
