Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
I love you like a cupcake loves an overweight child, very similar to the mannerisms of a whole cake but personal, and minus the commitment issues, plus just the right amount of icing; not to mention the convenience of mobility, and only a smidgen of the guilt😘
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
Randomize