My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
At the hospital, the nurse kept telling me that i either had appendicitis, a tubular pregnancy, or an ovarian cyst. I kept asking if i could just have chlamydia instead...
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
I want to be your penis for a week.
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
Randomize
