just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
Randomize
