i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
My dick has a subreddit
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
Randomize
