Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
Randomize
