U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
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