I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
