Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
Randomize
