Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
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