My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
My parents just checked my browsing history and now think I'm addicted to porn and am a necrophiliac. 1: I know it was you. 2: You're so dumped, that shit is sick.
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
I'm worried I'm going to miss my flight so I set a series of alarms on my phone to act as checkpoints to make sure I'll be there. 2am-stop drinking; 4am-stop fucking stephanie, get some sleep; 5am-wake up, fuck stephanie once more; 6am-get to the airport
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
Randomize
