actually, I'm a sock model
what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
Randomize
