names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
