Your tits are I can't wait for
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
I just got a handjob in the back of an Uber while a large German dude and a Midwestern fuck-boi sang along in falsetto to the Bohemian Rhapsody.
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize
