He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
Randomize
