i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
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