Telling her that my penis is called megatron was not a good idea for a first date.
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
Randomize
