Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Randomize
