so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
Randomize
