I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
I took your shirt off for you after you threw up on yourself, read you the ugly duckling, and then tucked you in. you better fucking love me, jackass.
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize
