Firetruck pulls up, fireman jumps out n knocks on my door, asks "do you know where Johnny lives?"
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
When are your genitals available?
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
Randomize
