I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
Dating a girl 4 years younger than you is like living in a Taylor Swift song...
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
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