drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
Pretty sure he proposed because my house is awesome. His ass is a ten and he's offering to pay more than half the bills... How expensive is a divorce really? I mean I could probably put up with him for three or four years but a lifetime is a big ask.
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