we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
Can you help me get ready before work? I need a look that says I'm-happy-to-help-but-I'm-hungover-so-leave-your-attitude-at-the-door-because-I'm-not-taking-anyone's-shit-today.
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
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