It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
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