I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
this is an emotional support booty call
Randomize
