i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
Bang-toberfest begins!!
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
PENIS EMOJIS WOULD MAKE MY LIFE SO MUCH EASIER GAH WHY DOES THE WORLD HATE ME
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
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