Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
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