I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
I am at a point in my life where I don't want to brush my teeth for my tinder date because toothpaste and martinis don't mix.
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
