wat bout pragnant strippers??
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
Randomize
