What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
Randomize
