i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
Randomize
