The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
Randomize
