I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
I sent him this really overly apologetic text asking him out. It was just sad. Not even 27 shots of whiskey can grow me a self-esteem.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
Randomize
